hey hey hey...
sup sup sup oi..

FREAKIN HELL BORED.. mayb not goin to australia..dad kinda buzy and mum can't be away for long.. so.. mayb gonna stay in s'pore for this month.. went taka today with mum.. walk around and shop for clothes and all..instead i'm the one buyin clothes.. wahahha. and my mum bought toilettries, one clothes and food.. how evil am i... well today is the 31th of may.. tomorrow's the 1st of june.. and yay! my b'day is comin this tueday. so.. can't wait.. but though i'm turnin 15 really soon, dun really know how it feels like bein 15.. just felt bein older as b'days past.. i just needa wake up and show my mum that i can be really responsible or let her trust me..and not be irresponsible and stuff like that..tht's how i wanna be yeah. oh and just wanna work harder this time round..no pain no gain.. just try.. and go for it.. really and seriously wanna improve on my chinese.. don't wanna slack or laze durin chinese class.. no more!!.. cuz the truth is, i've been not payin well attention enough durin mother tongue lesson.. :#.. GOSH! I'VE JUST SPIT OUT THE TRUTH.. tht is why i've been screw-ing my mother tongue durin the common test n mid-year.. now i really wanna improve at least make my mum proud/happy..if not she'll be naggin and all. and not forgettin, i've not done my holiday assignment..:#.. felt soo nonchalant durin june holidays.. let me think... guess i'll shall start alleviating my assignment by gluin my eyes onto it after my b'day or so yeah.. that will do.. seriously i've been tooo laid-back these days.. shall start on my hmwk after my b'day yeah..XD.. oh well, i'm soo exshausted.. shall stop here.. see ya peeps round.

when your heart decides
that it's time to let it through
there's no reason to be scared
to open up
cause love may be blind
but all of us don't see it
so just once in your life
if you hear the knock of love
just let it in

hold her closer when she cries
hold her closer when you know it's time to say goodbye
you hurry back to see her smile again
and hold him closer when he's down
when his world is upside down
turn it around

so hold her closer when she cries
hold her closer when she feels
she needs a hand to hold
someone who'll never let her go
and hold her closer when she's down
when her world is upside down
turn it around
hold her close.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

finally i'm back from overseas camp.

o well, we obviously took a bus all the way to malaysia checkpoint..then stop over at yong ping for a rest.. then drove all the way to taman hutan legenda camp..once reached there..we still have to walk up to the place..though it's tirin but good exercise and get ourselves ready for camp. haha.. then we went to our bunk. thought we would be sleepin on our sleepin bags but never expected that there was a double decker bed for us.. it's my first time goin for overseas camp and sleepin on the bed..niways, our instructors was lilian and shyam.. first day didn't really do anithin but went thinkin of a cheers and wadsoever that we needa do..first day our group was kinda non-enthusiatic and all. as in like not sportin and stuff...first day was borin and all... now for second day.. second day we went to the paddy field to learn bout the rice thingy.. and so we have to step on mud and best thing is, my shoe was all muddy.. but still, quite interestin..b4 we went to the paddy field, we did our CIP.. and CIP, we have to walk from one end to the other.. long long walk..till some of us felt de-hydrated, some felt like faintin, n some felt exshausted.. for example, sabariah wore two shirts and was giddy and all.. while i felt giddy and my face was rosey.. so the van had to drive those who are down.. after the whole walkin, rested for awhile.. went for kayakin.. though i dun really know how to kayak, but slowly i learn.. i had no partner and so i had to partner Izzat... both of us kinda collaborate with each other.. first of all, we had to do some water thingy.. as in like some of us are afraid of water so we had to go in the water for awhile holdin each others hands and stuff... then we went into the kayak boat.. after kayakin, we did raftin.. i had sunburn.. let'see what am i gonna parley bout...oh and the best thing is, there's this malay dance.. after dancin, they went pickin up students i mean callin us to come up.. and i was picked.. they kept forcin me but i reject them and they continue until they gave up...durin the camp''fire'' we had to perform.. in between there's a game...aniway, about the whole camp, i felt it was quite ok and quite fun... but my worst was nightwalk as i have phobia of darknest.. but then i was with atikah. i was kinda sheddin tears but she kept on cheerin me up and tellin me to relaxs.. thank you soo much atikah!.. yeah..

now that i'm finally back, i'm 100% exshausted.. gotta go for now...
thanks to the taman hutan legenda camp, i've got minor cuts and lots of rashes on my butt..THANK YOU!!..XD...

if i lay here
if i just lay here
would you lie with me and just forget the world

forget what we're told
before we get too old
show me a garden that's burstin into life

all that i am
all that i ever was
is here in your perfect eyes, they're all i can see

i don't know where
confused about how as well
just know that these things will never change for us at all

if i lay here
if i just lay here
would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Friday, May 25, 2007

NOTE TO YOU GUYS.. WILL BE OFF TO MALAYSIA, JOHOR, TAMAN LEGENDA FOREST CAMP. TMR-TUESDAY EVENING.. .


nuthin much but i ran into a ''fight'' or should i say argument between 2 sec 1s n one mly guy whose from other school.. went slappin khairunisa face n pushin her.. plus the guy went slappin shazleena's face n usin one finger to push her head..all sorts of nonsence.. don't wanna get into the story either... niways, just finish packin my final stuff..nw hope i can stay up abit late..

o well, gotta go..
cya guys/gurls/peeps.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

HELP ME!! I'M DEAD!!

gotten back my report book results. and my position..shall not shoot it out. cuz it's embarrasin..
pass 3 fail 3..how am i gonna let my mum see..she's gonna be upset if she sees my marks.. suppose to be passin my mother tongue yet i didn't nil it.. but at least i did improve my EOA.. and i pass my FnN.. maths.. used to get 40 plus overrral.. but now drop to 20 plus.. that's sooo DISGUSTIN.. shedded tears durin cpa..only for awhile..i went melancholy for awhile then my friends cheer me up.. but now...hearts pumpin. SHARKS!!!.. gonna try harder and this time round work harder for end-of-year.. after my june holidays, gonna start studyin and revisin..yes it's real...don't wanna stay back in sec 3.. NEVER EVER WANNA STAY BACK..aniway, stoppin for for the moment. haha. gotta go get ready and get changed into my stinky uniform and head to school for some sec 2s and 3s express parents meetin day..GROSS LAR..XD.... oh and i was bein punish by TANG for not bringin my exam paper 2.. stand for 1 hr.. and i slept durin EOA until mdm lim say'' those sleepin, better wake up or els i'll send you for detention'' i jerked up..

o well, gotta chao.

start to breathe and fake a smile
it's all the same after a while
i know, that you are tired
carryin ones you lost
a picture frame with all the thoughts
i know, you hold inside

i hope that you can find your way back
to the place where you belong

when you come back down,
if you land on your feet
i hope you find a way to make it back to me
when you come around
i'll be there for you
don't have to be alone with what you're goin through

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

DON'T WANNA GO FOR SEC 3 OVERSEAS CAMP!!!..sorrie but seriously. ain't got idea why i'm startin to despise camp soo much.. niway, just feelin to dead now. came back almost bout 6.3o. went ''gala ventin'' in school takin care of the sec 1s n 2s as they were practisin their dance movvvvvvve.. was storllin like a tortise together with amira,fatin,siti and sabariah..

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... haha.. schools gettin more bored each days.. and prefects stuff are like sooo shitty! oops..! feel like quittin prefect!!.. had enough.pffffffff...o well, goin off this saturday mornin!... 3hrs drive..together with classmates.. will see how it goes yeah. o well, gotta turn in soon..so.. chao yeah..

Monday, May 21, 2007

grrr.. goin for SEC 3 OVERSEAS CAMP !!! soooo DISGUSTIN!!! haha.. startin to despise camp!. no idea. the camp is like 4 days 3 nights. it's like out of singapore. that's in johor. which is in TAMAN LEGENDA.. 3hrs drive from singapore.!!. needa pack lots of stuff.. and friday u'll see me carryin a humongous or should i say a economy-size bagpack..and this friday the other instructors will come to us and discuss bot the cheer and will be doin n doodlin posters n so on. and the next day, we're off to johor!. MISS MY BED again.. and after camp, my whole back gonna ITCH!..i'm sensitive to some stuff ok!... aniway, today was such a bore..and ismail and zarif, they just love annoyin me.. their just one lame clowns.. hakeem!. durin maths class, while mdm tang was writtin the corrections on the whiteboard, both my legs was crossed-legged under the chair n back.. hakeem was like usin both his legs to tackle mine n clippin his legs onto mine. TIGHT! . strugglin to push his legs off.. luckily mdm tang didn't see..his just irritatin and VERI annoyin at times...niways, gonna go off playin RUNESCAPE! . see ya.

just because i saw you over there
doesn't mean it has to be
and i don't believe what you said
still can't get it out of my mind
i'm tryin to find my self approval
i've alreadi been there
alreadi done that
it got me nowwhere
and brought me nothin
but a good place to hide and noone to confide in now.

Saturday, May 19, 2007

seriously did nothin today.. suppose to tag along with my mum for her appointment today but didn't as i was sleepin like a log. couldn't get my ARSE off the comfatable bed. woke up at 12.30.. went washin up and all.. let's see...hmmm.. read newspapers..8 days magazine.. then mum came back..ate lunch.. what els did i do.. as usual on the computer but doin some projects of my own.. left the house bout 4 plus.. drove all the way for my dental apoointment..5 minutes late.. after dental appointment, mum bought walnuttty cake and came home.. practise my piano till dinner's ready.. then use the computer.. played games like runescape.. checkin friendster/hotmail/blogs. and now i'm bloggin as i'm kinda bored to death..listenin to repeated songs every single day. lookin for new songs to dl. or movies to dl..what els.. kinda chattin with ghostly people. haha.. that sounds spooky huh.. not doin that.. just bloggin and all. not chattin. been forced to gobble down some chinese medicine as i've got flame in my throat..grrr..so.. yea.. it's 10.59pm and so i've gotta go wash up and go kock off aight*.

what do you see
when you look inside your heart
a little thought
can walk a thousand miles
and change your life
when dreams lead the way
the impossible is suddenly in sight
every step you take
just brings it altogether
you gotta keep the faith
when all seems lost forever

Thursday, May 17, 2007

FINALLY! i'm back from camp yesterday afternoon. but still, headed back to school despite the fact that i'm dead exaushted..seriously, first thought, i wanted to skip school..then heard from mum that she pospone my piano lesson to nxt week.. so i was like. oh..ok..yay!.. haha.. since she pospone my piano lesson, then i shall head back to school..thanks to my mum.. well.. let me see.. let me talk about the sec 2 camp..

the sec 2 camp.. thought it's gonna be like last year.. much fun and enthusiasms.. but then when we reach there and stuff., instructor introduce themself and all..the instructor asked us which group are we in. we told them we were sec 3.. they thought we were class 3..zzz.. aniways, after that, was told where our bunk was.girls and guys was seperated of cuz..then it all started.. went to class five which was 2 DIL!!!.. my instructor was An and Hitomi.. so yeah.. introduce myself infront of the whole group.. and the instructor SABO me.. we have to play this game called ice-breaker as in like we have to introduce ourself and say other people's name.. started of with hitomi then An. thanks to An that i was the last person and i have to introduce myself and say the other guys name.. was kinda difficult to memorise their names.. grrrr.. oh yeah.. thanks again to that.. me and another mly guy, have to do a 4-feet... what's the 4-feet? have to spell out miss foo's name usin our BUTT!..i was like kinda shy and embarrase.. only did a letter O.. ahaha..zzz.. after ice-breaker game. did all the borin stuff..played this game called blow-wind-blow.. quite fun n a little boring.. and also this game called pass the message.. and did things like learn how to build up the tent and unbuild the tent..and also first aid kit. then we have to plan our cheer and stuff.. over all, my group wasn't that fun.. my group was all the way like a hum drum. that's why i'm like them not enthu at all.. some of the girls.. i felt kinda bored and stuff.. but some of the guys was enthusiatic for example taufik,dino, n some others...kk tht was first day..oh n first day i was like bein disturb( as in play with me) by instructor An,darryl and some others..they love disturbin me..was kinda irritated by them.. haha..shhhh.. kk then second day did some activities like rock climbing,abseling,flyin fox n all lar.. but wasn't a good weather.. was pourin like cats n dogs at first thn started to slow down a little.. then clouds started to gather and it's like gonna be pourin again.. but thanks it didn't.. so yeah..oh and we did kayakin and sea raftin and all.. but i didn't go as i'm havin my ehem*. not suppose to say out.. girls thing. hahah. sat together with rossy, nahmira,rasyidah.. i was all along talkin all kinds of crap and makin all kinds of stupid and unlogical jokes just to keep them entertain... then MISS FOO!! caught us sittin and not helpin them with the stuff whn their not in the sea yet.. pfff..wadever that is.. oh ya.. then when we're suppose to have our lunch, didn't know that dino was just beside me...he was kinda disturbin as in playin with me. another game was we have to cooperate with each other have the team work.. first i wasn't listenin to what instructor An was sayin until i saw dino pointin at hitomi and me.. i was like pushin his hand away again and again and again forth time whn i push his hand away from pointin at me, he went holdin my hands.. i was like kinda shock. alreadi his left arm was holdin my hands for awhile other of his hands was pointin at me..thanks to him i was being ask to stand up.. grrr... screw him!.. -.-''.. oh and the day b4 yesterday night time.. he ask me'' just now u kept on lookin at me right?'' i was like'' huh?.. no lar.. since when...'' he was like'' i know.. i got the feelin of u lookin at me.'' i was like'' no lar....... don't spout nonsence..'' he was like'' don't lie to me.. i know'' i just kept my mouth shut.. OMG!.. seriously, i didn't look at him.. but i know that he was lookin at me and even smilin at me.. his alwyas callin me for nothin..there's another activity where we have to find a way to bring the person inside the web. we can't touch the line.when it was my turn, they carried me and my long pants was startin to lower down bit-by-bit until the guys saw my undergourment. not only the guys but instructor An too.. the guys was like'' woi..woi.ehem*''(flirtin and all) as fast as i was in the web, i pull my pants up quickly. tht's soo embarrasin..and better still, dino was smilin away..-.-' k then the campfire... campfire was a success.. the girls wasn't enthusiatic.. i was like kinda singin myself together with guys behind.. the girls just kept quiet.. better still ramat went ticklin my side and acted as if it wasn't him...over all, the instructor wasn't happy and satisfide with us for our behaviour wasn't that good and all.. so yeah.. gathered in one circle and all..instructors talk to us about our behaviour and stuff like that.. then went takin a bathe and stuff.. and went to sleep.. was seriously dead tired cuz of me helpin fatimah in the middle of the night.. woke up two times as her arm hurts.. not blamin her. it's ok aniway.. cuz i can't sleep too. as i can't sleep at all..the next day i was sleepin away till i almost can't wake up to watch the time.. in the whole, the camp was ok to me though it's borin.. pfff..it's a pity that i didn't go for kayaking and sea raftin.. aniway, now it's all bout school,

damn!..gotten back my exam results. not in a mood acturlly..
CPA= 33/50
english paper 2= 32/60
EOA= 34/70
mother tongue= don't wanna mention. i flunk my chinese
maths= don't wanna say.. i flunk my maths too.
FnN=14/30.

omg! how am i gonna face my mum.. if i show my cpa to my mum, she'll be askin demandin for the rest of my exam papers results.. should i just keep ot quiet?.. i'm just toooooo worried sick and laid-back to show to my mum... how....
aniways, gotta go have my dinner..so..chao.

not in a mood.

whether i'm up or down
there's no crowd to please
i'm like a faith without a clause to believe in it
and if all the world was smilin
i would only ever want to see ur frown
you know they can sail away in sunsets
we'll be right here stranded on the groud
just happy to be found

Saturday, May 12, 2007

hey...
well, today's defenitely saturday like duh.. and tomorr's sunday and after that i'm gonna shoo off to NYAA camp!. hmph!.. seriously, i hate camps! dunno why..just hate camp..but, to tell you the truth, everytime, after some camps, i'll miss the fun and all. ahha. cuz some camps are like sooo sensational and fun. though we have to go through the hard and difficulty times.. but still, we survive through out the whole camp.. but it depends also on the instructor. the first time we saw the instructor, we thought it was borin..tht was when i was in sec 2. but in the end, the instructor was hilarous in the sense that he makes alot of jokes all.. their creative.. but this years sec 2 have to go for NYAA camp again. and the poor prefects, includin me. ahaha was asked to help out.. grrrr..thought i could escape and get it over with.. but..nahx... have to go. if not i'll get survier punishment. hmph!..DISGUSTING!!! haha..shhhh..XD... aniway, i did practically nothin at all today. was like lazing and slackin around..but of cuz i did packed my stuff for the disgustin camp. haha..half way pack. not fully yet..soo.. yeah..today as you know, i'm not vigorous..just felt liveless and all.. tomorrow have to go out with my mum to buy another cheap trackpants just for my camp..and let me check out my list on what i needa buy.. o well, does'nt matter.. cuz you don't have to know. haha.. sooo.. later on, guess gonna sing a b'day song or soo or celebrate my big cousins b'day and all... and tomorrow is mother's day. suppose to be doin a card for my grandmother and not forgettin my mum. though, she does nag and scold me sometimes.. still, i do love my mum.. wadever they do to us, it's always for our own good yeah. huahuahua..so yeah.. tht's all i guess. gotta start doin a card.soo..chao.

well i haven't memorized all of the cute things to say
but i'm working on it
maybe i'll master this art form someday
if i quote all the lines off the top of my head
would you believe
that i fully understand all these things i've read

i'm just tryin to find my way
tryin to find my way
tryin to find my way the best that i know how

well i haven't got it all figured out quite yet but
even if it takes my whole life
to get where i need to be
and if i should fall to the bottom of the end
i'll be one step back to you and

trying to find my way(x3)

Labels: TIRED

Thursday, May 10, 2007

YAYNESS!!..haha.

exams are defenitely way over. but still it's such a HUMDRUM after exams..i'm like all bored and all.. b4 exams im always buzy revisin n studyin..so much stress till i got a fever and cough n flu. but thankfuly i got well. alright.. even though b4 the examination, i do go on the computer for awhile.. let's say bout half an hour.. and even though i do slack at times or build castle in the air.. but still, i did study ok..that got me buzy..and now. nothing's keepin me buzy.. just finish practisin my piano after bout 1 or 2 weeks of stoppin my piano lessons..so. i'm right now updatin my blog.. oh yeah.. b4 it slipped off my mind, i was told to do spring cleanin after my exams by my mum.. as in clear my cupboard and those stuff that is unwanted since sec 1.. no since pri 6 till now but it's still in my cupboard filled with dust.. for that, i'll do it in awhile time yeah.. hahaha.. just feelin too lethargic for now.. dunno why.. ok let's talk bout today's exam..

today's exam was FnN.. 1hr 30 min. i did the whole paper in like 1hr n 10 min?. started at 8.15 and i finished at 9.o5-10? if i ain't wrong.. but i did checked. wanted to doze off but i can't cuz my form teacher, mr sulaiman, was in the class.. hahaha.=]... after the papers was being collected at 9.50..took my bag and stuff. then mr.sulaiman called me over and atikah.. told me bout my blog and thus, he read it... i was sort of in a dismay mood or should i say i was in a astonishment..?
but then, he started tellin me all bout dino and al.. like i should hang out with friends and all.. lazy to say it.. but ive learnt my mistake.. and realise that i shouldn't trust guys in the first place .. i mean i don't go round and believin in guys..i'm not dumb. lol..aniways, Mr.Sulaiman, if ur readin this, thanks for your advice. haha.

waitin for siti near the bookshop. as she was in the toilet.. soo fatin started makin stupid but funny jokes bout siti..made us laugh like insane..and until my stomach starts achin.. walk out of school. as usual..those crazi girls love makin jokes and laughin like hell and so did i.. that's like monkey see mokey do. hahaha. and what's with raudhah. everytime when she sees ani of my ex bf that she know, she'll come tellin me bout them when i don't even have them in my heart animore..it's not once, twice, thrice but more then that...weirdo..=p..o well, guess this is long enough.. and it's 3.29pm.. gonna practise my piano again at 4.00 b4 i get a shoutin.. i mean scoldin from my teacher..-.-''.. gotta chao for noe..see ya..

so now that it's over can't we just say goodbye?
i'd like to move on and make the most of the night
mayb a kiss before i leave you this way
your lips are so cold i don't know what els to say

i never wanted it to end this way my love
believe me when i say to you in love i think i'm falling here.

Monday, May 07, 2007

LEAVE ME TO CRY ALONE IN THE DARKNEST.

today was maths paper 1 and 2.. went to school..from 8.-8.20 went revisin for paper 1 maths.
well.. paper 1 maths guess i could handle at least 50% of it.. seriously. after paper 1.. it was break time..saw dino and told atikah to help me in some stuff.. but i was like trying to staunch her from tellin him.. aniways.. i went to my friend.. minutes later, saw dino.. quickly went lookin for atikah.. atikah went askin dino bout the girl called BABY TIARA in friendster.. gosh!.. atikah came back tellin me'' dino say because of BABY TIARA, his tryin to forget me.'' somethin like that.. i was like controllin myself. relaxin myself.. until i shed tears.. stood up and walk to the toilet.. but no tears came out..was still tryin to hold back my tears until we went to the classroom, i was sobbing tears out...the story goes like this

me: dino, can i ask you a question?...eyy.. u like me izzit?
dino: hehe
me: why u laugh?.. is it the truth?
dino: more like _ _ _ _ me..
me: love?
dino: yerp..
me: *readin message and rollin my eyes and grinnin frm ear to ear*
dino: cuz i've been lovin you since sec 1.
me: izzit?...ouh.. let me think bout it first.
dino: yerp.. so what's ur answer?
me: i don't know if it will afact my studies.. not that i want to reject you.. we'll see bout it* meanin is a yes*
dino: ok..
me: =]
dino: ok.. i've gotta go n sleep. gd night. luv ya.
me: ok.. night*. sweet dreams..=]]

nxt day..skip thw whole of morning and afternoon. no one wanna know bout tht.. haha.
at night.. after dinner.. skip that..around 9 plus.handphone rang.. went answerin my phone.

me: hello..
dino: bernadette..
me: yar..?
dino: dino..
me: ok..-.-''
dino: bout yesterday, don't tell anione k.. cuz it's irritatin if they ask me lots of questions..
me: ok..
dino: promise?
me: yerp.''
ends the call..

nxt nxt day. went browsin into friendster.. saw this baby tiara profile. have his photo in HER profile.. went askin for help from atikah..
atikah: dino, are you serious bout bernadette
dino: serious.
*sabariah msgin him*: if you are, then say i love you tmr infront of her.
dino: hey. it's not easy to say that three words ok
sabariah: of cuz it's easy.
dino: no it's not cuz u've not feel the real love like i did.
sabariah: i felt it b4 ok.
dino: hmmmm...?
siti took over
siti: btw, in ur friendster, i saw this username baby tiara, in her profile, there's ur picture.whose that?
dino: my fiancee
i took over
me: really?
dino: yes
me: then what am i to you? scandal?
dino: no.. i really love you but her parents and my parents wants us to get married when we're old enough.
me: then how can you be with me when you have the girl in ur heart and in ur mind?''
no reply until the next day that's today.. and in school, after paper 1, atikah went askin him.

4 minutes later atikah came to me
atikah: bernadette..
me: yesh..
atikah: she said......she said...
me: she ey..? oh..she.
atikah: eh no.. he say that cuz of her(baby tiara), he wan to forget bout me
me: silents in progress..while tears startin to boil up to my eyes gonna shed it out..
atikah,raudhah,fatin,amira,sabariah: bernadette,....relaxs... don't cry...
me: stood up, walk fast to the toilet..calmin myself down..went down again.
went to the canteen took all my stuff...
amira,fatin,siti,raudhah: bernadette... relaxs...dun cry....
went to the classroom....

5 minutes later i started sheddin tears non-stop after 10 minutes.. hahah
seriously... I HATE GUY SOMETIMES!!! I HAD ENOUGH OF GUYS LAR!..guys are like WADEVER..grr... why... don't wanna build up the story again and him!. don't wanna think bout HIM!!... then paper 2...
hearts pumpin like what.. kinda nervous when lookin at all the sums.. OMG!.
it was like a 30% for me.. didn't finish drawin the graph for the last question!!! spend too much time on the questions that are suppose todo on fullscape!...grrr... gonna SCREW MATHS PAPER 2!!...after that, went home together with my friends.. oh yeah.

JUST WANNA SAY THANKS TO FATIN,SITI,AMIRA,SABARIAH AND RAUDHAH.thxs for standin by my side when i'm in no mood today!.. thanks lots. LUV U GUYS MAN!..oh n atikah for helpin me all when i'm in much help.

hangin out with my friends for awhile and i went home..
pffff... now i can relieve stress by listenin to sentimental songs..and to shed tears all i want if i happen to cry again in my sleep... i ain't got school tomorrow!!!!! yes!.. but still have to study my FnN.. tht's my last subject! and exams are wayyy over..woohoo!.. but gross! camp is comin close to the date. pffff.. and i've alreadi sign up for some music composer thingy.. which should i go?..
aniways, i know this is soooooooo long.. cuz i ain't really buzy animore.. so i've got the time to post a beautiful mistake story yeah..

you're gone from here
and soon you will disappear
cause everybody's changing
and i don't feel right

so little time
try to understand that i'm
tryin to make a move to stay in the game
i try to stay awake and remember my name
but everybody's changing
and i don't feel the same.

Saturday, May 05, 2007

hey. o well.. been studyin my EOA just now bout 1.55-3.33.. and now i'm kinda updatin my blog..o well, don't really know wht to say bout i ain't got fever.. just havin a freakin COUGH and a running nose that's all.. every now and then have to take my medication and goble at 8 cups of water every single day..but the thing is i didn't goble enough. haha. niways.. monday is my EOA exam. so.. yeah..people who are pippin and glancin through my into my blog, do tag yeah.. and to all the secondary school students, wish ya all the best in ur mid-years yeah. o well, it's 4.28. gotta chao and GLUE MY EYES ON EOA..

my shattered dreams and broken heart
are mendin on the shelf
i saw you holding hands,standin close to someone els
now i sit all alone wishing all my feelings was gone
i gave my best to you, nothing for me to do
but have one last cry

one last cry, before i leave it all behind
i've gotta put you otta my mind this time
stop living a lie

i guess i'm down to my last cry
i cry......
i was here, you were there
guess we never could agree
while the sun shines on you
i need some love to rain on me
still i sit all alone, wishing all my feelings was gone
gotta get over you, nothing for me to do
but have one last cry

i know i gotta be strong
cause round me life goes on and on and on
and on....
i'm gonna dry my eyes
right after i had my
one last cry

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

hey.. well, this is the post for 2nd of may.

2nd may.
Dear diary, english exam!! was a little ok for me as the first part we were ask to write about '' to change my habits of being late, what are the reasons for being late and what is the punishment of the next time we were to be late'' quite hard to write but i just used my brain to think of what to write.. hope i know what i'm writting about.. then had breaks in between.. duh!! saw HIM! again.. him= DINO. i don't know why everytime i see him, my heart starts to beat and i'll get nervous and tryin to avoid him and stuff like that.. why?? am i just to nervous to call him or am i just in love?? aniways, after break, had paper 2.. it was quite alright until the form feeling part.. didn't quite understand what were they tlakin about.. oh and this time i read the questions carefully.. i didn't write but i circle the answer.. tab on my shoulder*..XD.. aniways, tomorrow's my CPA and i've got lots to read.. gosh! gotta blast. see ya!..


3rd may.
o well.. last night i SERIOUSLY FELT SOOO SICK.. HAD A VERI PAIN SORE THROAT that i can barely talk or laugh.. almost had difficulty to breath.. then flu comin down.. today, still headed to school with bad throat and flu.. and ehads spinni like shit!.. barely see colors clearly.. evething's kinda blur to me.. was sucking anticol..and i hav difficulties to swallow too.. seriously my throat was FREAKIN PAIN LAR...after CPA exam.. went home took same bus with sabariah and raudhah.. and i was like giddy and all.. felt like faintin down the streets.. at last i went home took a bathe and all.. took my tempreture.. 38.3.. imagine that.. super high fever!.. took artified and panadol.. went dozin off like a pig with thunders and lightin and pouring of the rain..just didn't feel comfatable lar... niways, my tempreture have gone down to 37.5. but still

MY THROAT HURTS TERRIBLY!.gotta go study for chinese tomorrow!.
see ya.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

pfff..though today is a labour day! still i have to study like hell.. and THUMBS UP FOR ME! gonna write letter soon and pass it to mdm nurli tomorrow!! haha. reason for resignnin prefect.. can't cope with my studies..seriously..o well, woke up at 7.40 out of the blue and thought that i have school today..was thinkin and frettin'' o shit! i'm gonna be HOT SOUP! oh no.. gonna go for detention!.. '' tht was my first thought. on the second though..'' eyy.. it's a holiday today...why the hell am i thinkin bout school..'' went back to sleep till 10.00.. woke up.. bath and all.. went parkway to have lunch with my mum..after lunch, mum says wanna go home cuz of me wanna study.. but then ended up we saw some nice clothes and went browsin at them.. then bought some clothes.. hahaha.. suppose to be goin home and yet buyin clothes huh...bought 2 new sweet clothes and aother black in color mini rubber type skirt..and mum bought a bag..was kinda rushin her..after that, went lookin at other stuff.. finalyl got out of isetan and went to MPH to buy a empty CD for mum to burn her songs.. thne went to GIANT.. stupid old guy.. his [ pervert eyes] was starrin at me as if he wanna fo somethin bad...eeee. niways, i shall stop here and go read some english story books or wad so ever to prepare for english tomorrow.. feeling soo nervous out of the blue...

these past few weeks
i've been confused
sometimes i wonder if
i'm better off alone

you fall in love
then break your heart
you fall in love again
it's never ending

i used to have this friend
who took his fiance
to see billy idol
a couple a weeks before
their wedding day.
the chick got backstage
and left my friend outside
next day he called
from a hotel
askin for a ride.

guess i'm givin up on love
cause it really kind of sucks.